Posted by DocMagi on Monday, January 15, 2007 at 8:21:50 PM
By now most of you might have seen the secret. If not I would recommend that you do because it is well made and has been a well known fact among peers for some time now. It is not that it is a secret it is that we do not want to admit that we have so much control over our lives at times. In NLP we first work to bring the client to cause rather than have them remain at effect for the situation. This simply means that we have them take control of their emotions and actions by asking them specific questions and using language patterns to understand how they create their reality. You might wonder what is meant by creating their reality when reality is supposed to be true. The fact is that there is no reality experienced by one individual that is absolute truth. This means that our minds filter all the information that we receive in order for us to understand it and put some sense to it. The issue is that if some information dissagrees with what you value or believe you will distort or delete the information to keep you internal programs.
So what does this have to do with attracting what we fear you might ask. The point is that what we focus on is what we attract because we make decisions based on what it is that we want to avoid or move from. If we put all this energy or focus on the things we want to avoid or fear then we can not leave this behind because we keep bringing it with us. In order to change this energy into a positive energy you must first accept the negative event. This means that once you realize that even if the negative was to occur you could do something about it then it no longer possesses any energy and focus. It is sort of a "SO WHAT" kind of feeling and you can now focus on what it is that you truely want. My friends the first person that needs to believe is you. If you do not believe that you can do something then do something that you believe you can do.
Pay attention to how you treat yourself internally. How do you refer to yourself and what do you say to yourself when you want to do something. You should be your biggest supporter but I have found that most people are their biggest critics. Some people are just plain mean to themselves and if you are one of them then pay attention and change your internal dialog. Hopefully I will have time to share some secrets to how to do that quickly and easily.
Have a wonderful 2007 my friends and remember that you are always in control of what goes on inside you. Only when you choose to allow yourself to react without purpose are you not using the gifts that you were given to succeed in life.
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by Desire on Wednesday, January 17, 2007 at 6:36:54 AM
Thank you for sharing this Doc..
I own the secret and love the message and the teachers. You are so right, I have found that the things I fear come to me.. I am learning to control my emotions to situations in my life. I know if I am not feeling joy, happiness or love I am not in alignment with my higher good.
I also know that I beat myself up to much over things. I am my own worst critic. I am learning to turn my thoughts around day by day. I am very interested in this subject and would love if you shared more about this and what you know!
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by DocMagi on Friday, January 19, 2007 at 7:08:08 PM
Thanks for responding to the post. Couple points to self communication are:
1. Ask yourself what is the purpose of this self talk? Ask yourself if the communication leads to the purpose or not. If it does not then change the self talk to what it is that you want.
2. Use a voice that is funny or sexy in your head when you use critical self talk. If the voice in your head is the sexiest voice you have ever heard you will find that it does not have the same effect on you as before. It actually can make it kind of fun to be critical at times.
I do not have a lot of time right now but these two things should help anyone to calm that inner voice. I will post more later.
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by MERLIN on Sunday, January 21, 2007 at 6:38:13 PM
I have seen "The Secret." I must say I was quite impressed with the content. It was right on point with the ancient esoteric teachings in regards to the axiom "as above, so bellow, as within, so without."
As I always say, we are our thoughts, for better or for worse. The key seems to be in maintaining awareness and control over our thoughts long and strong enough so that they manifest into the physical the way we want them to.
I would like to see a full documentary about the Emerald Tablets. It's interesting to note that while we are on the subject of attracting fears, that the Egyptian initiates would prepare to overcome fear in much of their training for that very reason.
A quote from Frank Herbert's Dune comes to mind: " Fear is the mind killer. I will face my fears, and let them pass through me. When the fear is gone, there will be nothing left. Only I will remain. "
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by Canshine on Sunday, January 21, 2007 at 10:35:46 PM
I also enjoyed watching "The Secret", although I have to admit it seemed extremely adolecent and childish in it's intent (being quite unaware of the real reasons for disparity in our world). I was also disapointed it didn't express the obsticles one faces when "intending" something. It is my underastanding that we, not so much attract what we fear, but when we ask something of the "I AM" within all, it will present specific challenges and obsticles we must overcome in order for the fruition of an intent to manifest.
We attract what we have, and we have what we intended in the past successfully... for better or worse.
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by DocMagi on Monday, January 22, 2007 at 9:22:44 AM
The question also might be is there a destiny for us or do we manifest our own destiny? If we allow ourselves to learn from our experiences do we move on and if we don't do we relive the lesson in different ways till that time that we do learn the lesson? I loved Dune and I agree with the summary that the Secret did not teach how to manifest everything but I believe that a movie can not teach the lessons of life either. If a person perceives a lesson as silly did they understand the lesson really and project silliness because they are past that lesson. When we look back on lessons can we still learn them again? In NLP values are explained in a way that relate to the big picture. Attraction and manifestation is just a matter of time. If I am attracting something I do not have it and if I have it I am not attracting it because it is real and present. The matter of attraction might be that as long as I am not willing to let go of what I fear I will always have it following me and influencing my decisions. As long as this happens how can I really learn the lessons that are being taught to me to grow and move on if I keep this baggage. It is time for many people to take a look at the baggage and give it to the salvation army or something because it does not fit their life anymore. Ask ourselves the question of does this really serve the purpose that it once did and if it doesn't then donate it to let it go my friends.
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by momowilly on Tuesday, January 23, 2007 at 8:15:56 AM
I'm working on this daily. I actually just gave one of my personalities a really harsh androgynous Jamaican accent to keep me motivated. Maybe like replacing my mother and father internally as I am so used to being the boss, I give myself too many breaks. I need that kick to keep me focused and know that I can do anything.
Thanks!
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by Cassiel on Thursday, February 8, 2007 at 6:44:29 AM
i haven't seen "the secret"...though,
just in the past few years I have learned what i fear will come to me...i try to do my best to think positively and not to put myself down...i always used to be focused on I am poor, fat and ugly, those were the results i got...i was always worried about where my next meal was coming from and always had to buy new clothes because my old ones were getting too small, also when i used to call myself ugly, people would somehow feel that and want nothing to do with me....my point is, i have been trying to change how i think consciencely and sub-consciencely...my self-awareness is so much more heightened now... now, i have friends that make sure i at least have one meal a day and i went out last month and bought a smaller pair of jeans and i dont think myself as ugly anymore
sorry for all the rambling
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by kristin on Friday, February 9, 2007 at 8:15:35 PM
I am sorry, can you please tell me what the Secret is and where I can get a copy? If it has anything to do with what you are talking about I would love to see it. Your post was so intersting and so true, yet so hard to do. Thank you for sharing :)
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by quantumpork on Saturday, February 10, 2007 at 7:45:29 AM
Interesting point. In my opinion, we often focus too much on our fears associated with danger, but not enough on those from indiscretions. Fears related to sensation are quite different from those based on emotions, and it is the emotional fears that may cause us the most lasting scars.
Grabbing the handle on a hot pan leads to knowledge, using a hot pad comes from wisdom. Fears can be found before or after knowledge, but are not often found after wisdom. Assumption can at times replace knowledge, I assume that if I jump off a cliff I will die. So, being wise I don't jump off cliffs.
In the case of many emotional fears, forgiveness is routinely the catalyst that can develop knowledge into wisdom. For most, being forgiven by others is much easier than self-forgiveness. As before, assumption can replace knowledge, I assume that if I cheat on my wife, she would be hurt. So, being wise I don't cheat on my wife.
My belief in God and my humble submission to Him, is my 'secret' and it gives me great comfort that I can forgive 'myself,' as He will when I'm stupid. This is not my license for stupidity, but it is a higher accountability. For me faith, reduces emotional fears, and I am eternally thankful. For other fears, I use a hot pad.
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by DocMagi on Sunday, February 11, 2007 at 9:15:55 AM
A hot pan is not fear but reality. The fear that I am discussing is that in which we fear the unknown which you also are referring to in a way it seems. Jumping off a cliff we assume we will fall and falling is a fear we are born with for good reason. We are born with two fears: the fear of falling and of loud noises. We develop our other fears from our lives. Interesting point of forgiveness for a way to eliminate fear. In my line of work I have found that acceptance is the easier way to eliminate fear. We fear something because we do not want to accept that reality but when we accept it then we find that there are so many other choices that the one choice we feared becomes so small that it does not appear to be an issue. We have all heard of tunnel vision at one time or another when what we are working on becomes our entire life and that is all we can see. We keep tunneling in and pretty soon the issue or event becomes so big and consuming that everything else just seems to dissappear. When this happens our choices and life becomes fixed on one direction. At this time some people might resort to look up or inward to find God and surrender to a higher authority. The whole surrendering to a higher authority is still done in a way that you believe that things are going to work out. I think I will do another post on God to get a discussion going on religion versus spirituality. Might be a good topic for some good discussion. Anyway back to the subject here. The way to solve the challenge is to increase the options providing us with a choice. I have found that frustration comes from not being able to make a choice most of the time. Fear is from making the wrong choice and in most cases it has nothing to do with physical pain just the unknown and expectations or limits that have been placed on us by ourselves. We like to put stipulations for everything in our live. A friend is this God is that and so on. Every time we go to define anything we limit what that thing is. If we say that a friend is this then what happens when they are not? Defining things in my opinion just restricts what they are and allows people and events to let me down. A boring way to live in my opinion. Accept people, accept the unknown and be open to life in order to live it and experience it fully. Say YES often and question anything that limits you from doing something. Make a conscious effort to stay open to people and events. Hate and fear is a limiting emotion and anyone spreading hate is sending a negative message. Behaviour is not the person but the programing they have to work with so don't judge the person. Thanks for taking the time to respond to this post and my opinions are just mine and the joy of discussion is learning from each other if we choose to, or not.
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by quantumpork on Sunday, February 11, 2007 at 9:46:12 PM
First of all I would like to state that I am not an industry pro nor have I attended college or claim that I am an expert. All I have is a love of God and a laptop. I have a web site as you do, but I have nothing to sell only to share at my expense. Second, this will be my last post on this subject because I do not wish to argue or insult because it is not my style so you may have the last word. I pray that you will answer my questions because I do wish to repudiate the claims that you made related to my previous post. I will address them in order.
"A hot pan is not fear but reality."
I agree, the hot pan is not fear nor did I state that it was. My analogy was based on the physical interaction with a hot pan and not the pan its self. The possibility of injury caused from unprotected contact and a hot pan fits the definition of fear.
"The fear that I am discussing is that in which we fear the unknown which you also are referring to in a way it seems."
Fear is defined as an unpleasant emotion caused by a belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat. Fear for definition is a feeling of anxiety the outcome of something or the safety and well being of someone. Can you explain how the unknown is represented in either of these definitions? I have heard people say that there is a fear of the unknown, but philosophically this seems implausible.
Let me explain. If we say that the unknown has an infinite value, and that we fear the unknown, then what we fear would then also be infinite. This would mean that if a reader were to be inflicted with this problem, they would fear reading this because the next sentence is unknown. I believe that a calculated effect related to a specific cause, or the possibility of not knowing all probable effects related to a specific cause may be more likely.
You also said that, "We are born with two fears: the fear of falling and of loud noises. We develop our other fears from our lives." This seems to contradict the premise that you stated about the unknown. As we develop, do we increase the unknown? I do know, the smarter I get, the less I know.
"Interesting point of forgiveness for a way to eliminate fear."
I stated that my faith 'reduces' emotional fears for me. If it were to 'eliminate fear,' I would be the bravest person that has ever lived.
"In my line of work I have found that acceptance is the easier way to eliminate fear."
This sentence is the most confusing to me. Acceptance of what, easier than what, eliminate all or specific fears???
"We fear something because we do not want to accept that reality but when we accept it then we find that there are so many other choices that the one choice we feared becomes so small that it does not appear to be an issue."
Please could you explain this, I'm not smart enough to glean your intended implication.
"We have all heard of tunnel vision at one time or another when what we are working on becomes our entire life and that is all we can see. We keep tunneling in and pretty soon the issue or event becomes so big and consuming that everything else just seems to dissappear. When this happens our choices and life becomes fixed on one direction. At this time some people might resort to look up or inward to find God and surrender to a higher authority. The whole surrendering to a higher authority is still done in a way that you believe that things are going to work out."
I will be honest with you that this statement is what inspired me to write this response. It is difficult for me to even elaborate on why this bothers me so much because I find it so condescending and insulting. If anyone were fitted with blinders it would be your knowledge of Christians. My I assume that this is something you fear? It seems to me a subject that is unknown to you, or is it that you don't like accountability to a higher power?
I have self-studied cosmology, quantum and particle physics, string theory and philosophy, (have a conversation with a cosmologist about that movie you sell on your site). I have expanded my view and it all leads me to Christ. You are correct that I am fixed on one direction, you just got the order wrong.
"I have found that frustration comes from not being able to make a choice most of the time. Fear is from making the wrong choice and in most cases it has nothing to do with physical pain just the unknown and expectations or limits that have been placed on us by ourselves."
I could be wrong but this seems more of a Decidophobia than fear.
"Every time we go to define anything we limit what that thing is."
This is confusing to me. I thought that we could only communicate accurately if all things maintain a shared consistent definition. This is why mathematics can offer exact values. Because integers maintain a specific value, this allows everyone to come to the same conclusion.
"If we say that a friend is this then what happens when they are not? Defining things in my opinion just restricts what they are and allows people and events to let me down."
When a friend lets me down, they are still a friend. Enter forgiveness. A true friend will still be there even if I let them down, like Jesus is for me.
You should heed "Make a conscious effort to stay open to people and events. Hate and fear is a limiting emotion and anyone spreading hate is sending a negative message." I do not hate anyone! My question is, where was I spreading hate in the above post?
I need to end this because I have already said more than I want too. I never intended to belittle your original post, I was only stating my opinion on fear. I pray that you will gain a greater understanding of spiritual individuals.
Other interesting definitions:
Acceptance - the mental attitude that something is believable and should be accepted as true;
Submission - the action or fact of accepting or yielding to a superior or to the will or authority of another person.
God bless you,
Dennis
If you have time, read my paper "The Philosophical Paradox of Opinion" in the Classic Philosophy, Religion & Spirituality arena. Thanks.
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by DocMagi on Monday, February 12, 2007 at 8:19:02 AM
Dennis,
Thanks for your comments. You have a good command of the english language and have expressed yourself very well. I hope your prayers are answered and you have a wonderful week. I will also take some time to read your paper when I get a chance. I love to find out other points of views when it comes to life and opinions.
EXACTLY!!! Comment by Andrea LF on Wednesday, February 14, 2007 at 7:11:34 PM
...And how stronger is the person who can look the negative issue(s)/person/people/event(s) in the "face" and say SO WHAT. Now THAT is power. I have felt it. I knew that the situations that I have had, I would never be able to conquer them. So I just flat out said, "there is nothing that I can do to change the past/present. I just have to do my best and go from there. S*it happens. That is life. How I deal with it from here is what counts." The moment I said and BELIEVED that statement, I ultimately won.
No, it will never take away what happened, but it severed the tie it had with me... I no longer gave it power over me. I won.
I adopted that same philosophy with the rest of my life's events and wowser, I can't really complain much. I have a swell life.
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by cowboycraig on Sunday, February 25, 2007 at 11:34:37 AM
Don't think about what you do not want, it is that simple.
If you really must think about it, just do it, and be done with it. Think about what hurts you, and pisses you off, without attaching the desire to attack. Just get it clear and let it go. SOMETIMES you Have todo that. Don't let poeple spook you with piffle, you will be fine, just be sure to get over it. Sometimes so real growth comes from understanding our wounds, and what bothers us.
Now if you have a person that is in your line of fire from nasty thoughts towards them, know you are connecting yourself to them. What you think about for better or worse you are CONNECTED to and bringing into your experience.
Imaging your enimy before you. Say gimme that head! and kiss them on the forehead. MEAN IT! do it when ever they come to mind. Thank them! you needed an asshole to block a path you your life that would have only meant more tears....
Thank your imagined enimy and kiss them on the head rather then wish them (and yourself) ill.
Let them go..... and get on to what is next (and better)
Re: We attract what we Fear!!! Comment by amawitch on Monday, April 23, 2007 at 7:09:03 PM
"The fact is that there is no reality experienced by one individual that is absolute truth. This means that our minds filter all the information that we receive in order for us to understand it and put some sense to it. The issue is that if some information dissagrees with what you value or believe you will distort or delete the information to keep you internal programs. "
This jumped out at me the most. I have not had access to the Secret. I dont even know really what you are talking about, but in reading the posts I can somewhat understand a small portion of what might be read and learned.
But the quote above is what really made alot of sense to me. I tend to do this, and I know it. When i catch myself I have an innerself that comes to the surface and argues with me, until one of us"wins". So far its been a give and take, lol. What I face daily I face in others, because I see me in them. And I cant run from that because that is my lifes work, to help them, free them, and get them on their feet.
Let me see if I can make this clearer.
I am on forced early retirement. I still have my "hands" in the thick of a few personal loves. The homeless, the abused, the hungry, and the lost.
When I see a sick woman beaten senseless and afraid to start over because shes been convinced of her own worthlessness, I try to run from that, because that happened to me. Instead I seek her out, talk with her, teach her what I had to do and still do to be a me that I am instead of my abusers creation. Does that make sense to you all? In that way I am helping myself face my own self issues. I cant run from them. I own them. And only I can change what needs to be changed. But I do this from helping others.
Anyway, I am going to keep reading this post until I get the whole thing, and can understand exactly what it is that has everyone so "up". I need "up" so much. Knowing that only I can do that, is alot of weight on my shoulders, and yet not to much to bear.
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